What to do, when you don't know

A few times a year I find myself drawing back here to write during crazy transitions in my life. It seems that things get so bottled up in my head over the months and I get to this breaking point of needing to get it out somehow. Thus, writing comes in. Now I guess I understand why people call writing "therapy."

But you know what I mean. Lots of changes have occurred or are going to occur soon and lately I've found myself having a really hard time taking it all in.

This past January I moved out for the first time, only to have to move back home after 2 months due to some unfortunate circumstances with my apartment. At the time I was super upset and honestly felt like a failure. It's not fun to tell people you have to move back in with daddy because apparently you can't afford a healthy and safe place of your own...only dump yards. Yep. Anyway, moving on. It took me about a month of transitioning back home before I started realizing that I needed to stop seeing things through a negative scope.

I've always been a positive and optimistic minded person, for the most part. So it was strange that over the last 3 months I'd just felt a dark cloud looming over me. I was so focused on what wasn't working out in my life that I forgot to look at the potential opportunities laid out in front of me.

That's why over the last couple months I decided I need to reevaluate what I wanted out of life and how to make it happen for myself.

I haven't been happy at my day job for quite a while, really the last 6 months or longer if I'm honest. It's not the company itself. I love the owners and my coworkers are great. The work itself isn't hard...and maybe that's part of the problem. I haven't felt challenged or any growth happen in this last year. I do the same monotonous duties everyday and they aren't enjoyable or motivating. I got to this place where I realized I can't settle for a job that isn't a career, where I spend half my days getting yelled at about pointless things and the other half surfing Facebook because there's not enough work to do.

So as of next week, I will no longer be working for the company. It's a huge step and I'm pretty nervous about, however I can't wait to start the next chapter in my life towards finding what I want to do. And let's be honest, what better time than when you don't have all the expenses of living to tie you down?

So while I take this next move, I've also decided that I want to travel and see more of the world. Adults always say "travel while you can," so I'm taking the leap! After graduating college I thought I needed to follow the norm and get a full time job wherever I could, move out, blah blah blah. But you know what? That hasn't turned out so well for me. It might for others, but I know now in my heart that I need time to be with myself, grow and enjoy life more. As I learned 4 (almost 5) years ago, life can be taken from you at any point without a second glance to take every chance that comes your way.

I'm still a mess and probably always will be, but life is messy. It never goes as you want or expect it to unless you mentally decide to make the change in your heart and love things as is. I hope to find encouragement and in return give encouragement to anyone that needs it. :)

♡♥♡

I'll Take A Side Of Chili Red, Thanks ;)

Hello my pretties! Back to another work week after a lovely 4th of July weekend. I wish 3 day weekends were an every week thing...then again I suppose they wouldn't feel so special when we do have them. Still, having them a little more often wouldn't be too terrible of an idea, right? Hehe.

So I have VERY exciting news! Last week I made my first ever huge adult purchase, A NEW CAR!!!

Okay fine, a new used car. But whatever. It's new to me. And it looks new, drives smooth, is only 5 years old and most importantly: it's a Mini Cooper! Too adorable to describe, so here's a pic (or two, or four lol):

Ahh I'm in love! I am so excited and proud that I made this choice and was actually able to at this point in my life. I feel incredibly fortunate that I have a job to fund it, a great parent that taught me good financial skills (thanks dad!) and the freedom to make my own decisions.

That's it for today. Just wanted to show off my new beauty to the world! Still deciding on a name for her, yes it's a her haha. Ideas?

♡♥♡

Simply Put, "I shouldn’t have to beg."

First off, Happy Friday...seriously all mah homies (and future self who will hopefully read this again on a Friday lol). We made it through another work week and that is cause for celebration!! Tonight I'm going to my dad's Wind Ensemble concert at the Lafayette Hotel with Gabe and a few others to enjoy some classic music and sip on a few cocktails :) Seems like an appropriate way to spend a Friday night, am I right?! I'm excited to relax with friends and soak up some old school vibes.

This week was good over all, but something pretty lame happened. I honestly don't want to get into it too much because I do know that this is an open blog that some people maybe glance at from time to time and I refuse to ever put anyone on blast, or cause harm or hurtful messages to them. However, I created this blog way back when, partially so that I could document stepping stones in my life to reflect on someday and hopefully learn from. Kind of like how musicians write songs to get them through experiences and get if off their chests.

I don't really know how to talk about it without getting emotional and going in detail, and I can't seem to find any of my own words that are fitting. So I turned to a blogger website that I thoroughly enjoy reading posts on called Hello Giggles to find some comfort and advice. This site is so great to find posts on really anything and everything you can imagine (primarily for the average woman, but guys too)! I stumbled upon this post and it encouraged my heart as I read it, knowing that other besides myself and a few of my close friends have had people come and go in their lives this way too.

Cutting people out of your lives, especially a person who you once called one of your dearest friends, is drastic. While it is a sucky situation and I don't wish anyone to go through a friendship ending this way, it's real and it happens. But anyways, if you've dealt with a friendship breakup or even if you haven't, I feel like this girl's post sums up really well what it feels like. Soooo, without further ado, if you want to read the blog here it is:

http://hellogiggles.com/friendship-break-ups/

Now, go hug your friend or your pet (same thang haha) and tell them you love them, because life is too short to hold grudges and cut people out. And if they do, "There are plenty of other people out there who would do anything to hold your hand on that big, giant ocean."

♡♥♡

A Ghost From Blog's Past

My oh my! This blog looks mighty dusty, hypothetically of course ;) 8 months sure knows how to blast right past you if you let it...which I suppose I did.

I'm not going to sit here and whine about how I've just been too busy to write and how I've wanted to keep up with my blog of the last half a year, but haven't had the opportunity to because let's face it. Those are excuses. I know it. You know it. The blog ghost knows it! I truly believe that if you want to do something, you will find a way to work it into your schedule and make it happen.

I really don't know why I lost interest in blogging for a while. I guess maybe I felt like it was an inconvenience for me or that I needed to focus my attention on finding a job, not typing up random thoughts or reviews that no one even looked at except for me. Which honestly I've always been fine with. I didn't start this blog so that everyone would follow me and want to read what I had to say. I started it so that I could have somewhere to get my thoughts and ideas out, share random moments in my life and hopefully have somewhere to look back on in the future. However, if you are a friend, family member or complete stranger and you do happen to read this please know that I feel so stoked and honored that you care enough to take time out of your day to read my silly posts. YOU. ARE. AWESOME. :)

So why am I all of a sudden raising my blog from the depths of the ghost world?? Well for starters, a whole lot has happened this year so far. I turned 23, started a full time job, sort of put my cupcake/bakery business on hold because of this, began apartment searching and so far failed, watched my sister move to Houston in hopes of making her dreams come true, went to a nutritionist to get my health on track (finally), lost close friends, regained even closer friends, maintained best friends, and now have found myself once again confused with where I'm headed next on this crazy road lol.

Last night I was laying in bed and all I could think about was my blog and how much I missed this part of myself. I feel like in the last 6 months I've kind of lost the creative, outgoing, freethinking side of myself. I want to reintroduce this part of me and try my best not to let it go this time around.

I'm definitely not promising anything, but I do hope to myself that I can try to document more of the amazing (and not so amazing) parts in my life so I never forget them.

♡♥♡

Disneyland Gone Pumpkin

Sadly it's been a few weeks since my last blog post because life has just been getting busier (if that's even possible) so I thought I would return with a yummy post about my recent excursion to Disneyland!

In case you didn't know, I'm a proud member of the crazy obsessed pumpkin lovers club! Well I don't think there's an a official club, but someone really should start one due to the pumpkin flavored everything frenzy that seems to grow more and more popular each year...and trust me, I'm not complaining! I'm totally guilty of including something pumpkin-y into my daily diet during these few wonderful fall months. So naturally I've been reading a lot of articles lately about all of the new and returning pumpkin flavored foods that Disneyland is offering this year. My dad and I decided to cruise up after work last Friday and spend a relaxing evening at the happiest place on earth, while indulging in some of their tummy warming, fall spiced concoctions.

First, we tried out their very own version of a pumpkin cream cheese muffin. We picked it up at the coffee stand on Main Street USA in front of the Frontierland entrance. Unfortunately, we were too hungry when we got there that we ate the whole thing before I got a picture of it. We were slightly disappointed with the flavor. It tasted more like an apple spiced muffin rather than pumpkin, but overall it was still good. Next, we tried the pumpkin twist from Maurice's Treats located in the Fantasy Faire area. It was SO delicious!! Once again I didn't get a chance to take a picture because my dad devoured it instantly, but trust me guys...this one is a winner. I think it may have been my favorite pumpkin dessert out of all the ones we tried...maybe. It was so flavorful, without being too much and wasn't very heavy. It was light, sweet and buttery, with the perfect amount of pumpkin.

Our last yummy stop was at the Jolly Holiday Bakery on Main Street USA. We picked out the pumpkin cupcake, pumpkin cheesecake and pumpkin spiced latte (in their new seasonal Halloween mug of course)!

We didn't quite understand the concept of the cupcake when we initially bought it. When we read the name "pumpkin cupcake" we assumed it meant a pumpkin flavored cupcake. However, after the first couple bites we realized that it was just a regular yellow-spiced cake with a buttercream frosting in the shape of a Mickey pumpkin. Presentation wise it was adorable and so creative, but I have to admit I was a little bummed it was just a normal cake. Luckily, we tried the pumpkin cheesecake afterward and oh my goodness...it was incredible! It tasted pretty close to pumpkin pie, but with a delicious cheesecake consistency and crust. 

Oh, I almost forgot! We also had the pumpkin beignets from the Mint Julep Bar in New Orleans at the end of the night, which is a dessert staple of ours every year, and they were yummy as always (I highly suggest trying these)!

So if you're planning a Disneyland trip this fall I definitely suggest checking out these treats for yourself, and if you try/have tried any of them I would love to hear what you liked or didn't like in the comments below!

Now looking back on all of the sugary food we had...I think I need to go on a cleanse ;)

♡♥♡

Camping 101...Eternal Fest Weekend!

Well guys, I survived my first music festival and camp out over the past weekend in Jacumba, CA. And guess what?? It was a blast!

Yup, I actually enjoyed camping...who would have thought?! I never figured myself for a camper, but after sleeping in a tent for two nights and cooking on a mini stove I feel like I'm a pro! Alright maybe not a pro, but at least now I can add it to my list of things accomplished. :)

Eternal Fest went off with a hit on Friday afternoon. Of course it was stressful and things went wrong, but all in all it was an incredible event. Over 100 musicians were there and although the crowd wasn't as huge of a turnout as expected, the stages were constantly rocking with electronic beats that got everyone moving! Gabe and I's good friends John and his wife Brooke helped manage and put on the festival. They provided one of the stages which was an ambient dome that built entirely from scratch by John. At night it had tons of disco lights and projectors to give it that perfect dance room vibe. It was an amazing display that definitely stole the show.

Gabe had the pleasure of performing in the dome Friday and Saturday night in his one man band, Digital Lizards of Doom while I sold merch outside. It was freezing, but so neat to be a part of!

The actual camping part was quite an experience, but I definitely enjoyed it over all. Getting to hang out and share it with awesome friends was really fun and worth the discomfort of dirt, sleeping on the hard ground and using port-o-potties ;)

(Gabe in the "green room" behind the dome stage)

(Our view of the stages from our camp grounds)

(Nick, Jesse and Gabe aka my favorite boys of the weekend!)

 

(Nick showing off his awesome one man tent haha)

Can't wait until the next Eternal Fest or other music festival we get to participate in! I also want to try camping in the mountains at some point just for the fun of it. I feel like that might be a little more relaxed...just sayin' ;)

♡♥♡

Camping...For The Non-Campers ;)

Who has two thumbs and is going camping tomorrow?? That's right folks, this girl! Some of you may or may not know, but I've actually never been camping before. You could say that my family is made up of a bunch of non-campers. My parents never camped growing up, therefore we never went camping while I was growing up. My only camping experience (if it counts) would be 6th grade camp and unfortunately it was a nightmare, thus proving to myself that I am not the camping type.

So why in the world am I going camping now? I'll tell you why...ETERNAL FEST!!

Eternal Fest is a festival out in Jacumba, CA where electronic artists get together and perform on 3 different stages for 48 hours straight. Yup. Live, nonstop music with no breaks. That means you could technically wake up at 5 in the morning if you wanted and there would be some sort of performance going on. Crazy huh?

Why am I going to this festival? Because my boyfriend is one of the bands performing! Digital Lizards of Doom will be at the Dome stage 9pm on Friday and Saturday night, grooving it up and getting the crowd moving! He is so stoked for this opportunity and I'm really excited for him as well.

Since it's an outdoor festival, naturally we will be camping. I'm pretty nervous to camp for the first time because lets face it, I'm a homebody. I like my bed, shower, chai tea latte's and fuzzy slippers. I'm not so much of a dirt, sleeping bag and no running water kind of girl. But hey, these are the things we do for love, right? ;)

I've done some research online, talked to some friends who have camped and have come up with a list of camping must haves. So if you're a seasoned camper or you've never been camping either, hopefully these tips/gadgets can come in handy for you next time you go up the the mountains or a music festival!

Camping List:

•         Dry shampoo
•      Deodorant
•      Toothbrush/Toothpaste
•      Sleeping bag for cold weather and a camping mat (for extra comfort)
•      Chair and pop up tent for shade
•      Flashlight (for late night bathroom trips)
•      Non-perishable food (like granola bars, trail mix, canned soup, oatmeal and dried fruit)
•      Make up (but stick to BB creams and light foundation)
•      Sunscreen
•      Toilet paper
•      Towel
•      Bags for dirty clothes
•      Summer Eve wipes (for all my ladies)
•      Baby wipes/wet ones...lots of them!

If you have any other suggestions or things I may have forgotten, comment below and let me know!

      For now, wish me luck and happy camping! ♡♥♡